Saturday, December 25, 2010
I was surrounded by friends and loved ones, and the space was filled with laughter and love. I spent the weekend with my family, and shared many fun and special times with them.
I also got to share some laughter and stories with the man who has my heart. John called me this morning and we were able to spend a few special moments that have happened to us since we've been apart. We talked about how we feel ourselves growing ironically closer together, and stronger as a couple, and how special this time is for the both of us. During that hour of hearing his voice, over and over again it was confirmed that HE is who I was meant to share my life with and HE is the reason I have gone through every experience I've ever had. And I thank God for the circumstances that brought us together. If we hadn't both endured our heartache and hardships, we might not have ever found such a strong connection or would have been ready for such a strong connection.
John is doing wonderfully and has really taken to the people and the lifestyle. He has grown SO much spiritually and I am grateful for that. He was already a spiritual powerhouse prior to the mission, but he gave me some amazing words of enlightenment that I know would not have been possible but for his mission. His unwavering faith, no, knowledge of the mercifulness of our Father is astounding. He knows with a surety of future blessings and is such an example to me of that. I love this man with all of my heart, and can't wait til NEXT Christmas when he will be returning home 2 days after the holiday.
Merry Christmas to all of you, and I wish you all the happiest of times. Cherish your loved ones, no matter how far they are.
Friday, December 17, 2010
Monday, December 6, 2010
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Monday, October 11, 2010
Wasn't in a blogging mood at all until I sat here and thought about it. I should update, I thought. People think I'm depressed. Well my friends, in ADDITION to my new addition (see last post), I am writing again. :)
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Dr. Isobel 'Izzie' Stevens: When Dylan died, when the bomb went off, did you feel, like...
Dr. Meredith Grey: What?
Dr. Isobel 'Izzie' Stevens: Like you were moving in slow motion?
Dr. Meredith Grey: He was there and then he wasn't. Like I blinked and he was gone.
Dr. Isobel 'Izzie' Stevens: I feel like I'm moving in slow motion. Like I'm moving in slow motion and everything around me is moving so fast and I just wanna go back to when things were normal. When I wasn't "Poor Izzie" laying on the bathroom floor in her prom dress with her- her dead fiance. But I am. So I can't. And I'm- I'm just stuck. And there is all this pressure cause everyone is hovering around me waiting for me to do something. Or say something, or flip out, or yell and cry some more and I'm happy to play my part. I'm happy to say the lines and do whatever it is that I'm supposed to be doing if it will make everyone feel more comfortable. But I don't- I don't know how to do this. I don't know how to be this person. I don't- I don't know who this person is.
Dr. Meredith Grey: Izzie...
Dr. Isobel 'Izzie' Stevens: How did this happen? How did we end up here? Why am I alone? Where's Denny?
Dr. Meredith Grey: You're not alone Izz.
That is all. Thank you friends.
Monday, September 20, 2010
I was talking to a friend tonight, and he casually reminded me that being out almost 9 months isn't that far into 24 months... Eff my life. Thank you for reminding me of a fact that I live with everyday.
I honestly wish I could tell him to come home sometimes. I know I sound super ridiculous right now, but this is the only place I'm allowed to write this down and not have to write a "jk" after. Because really... I'm NOT "jk". I'm completely and utterly serious. COME. HOME. NOW. Eff sacrifice. Eff strength. Eff blessings. I. WANT. JOHN.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
I got the job at the children's daycare center! I start on Friday and I am actually really excited! I honestly am feeling like childcare could be my career. I really enjoy working with children and I actually feel fulfilled in doing it. I have a hands on influence on these children's lives, and I help mold their futures. :) But of course, I am not going to give up on my music as a career option. If my "recording producer" would actually be in town for longer than 10 minutes, I can get going on that. LOL.
Speaking of, Jason is in San Fran right now on a business errand until tomorrow morning. I was going to give him a package to deliver to John, but alas, he flew straight from his va-kay in Hawaii to San Fran. So instead, he is going to try and look up John's number and see if he can take the Elders out to dinner. I love my friends and their want to help out my boyfriend. :) I'm excited for him, but mostly jealous. Who am I kidding, I'm all the way jealous. I wanna see my boyfriend. LOL.
I'm feeling artsy right now. I sat down to write a new song, but all I got was the first verse and the chorus progression. I need to sit and actually write some lyrics now.... But I need to get back in the mood I was feeling when I started strumming out the progression. The progression sounds a little "confused" and right now all I am feeling is "excited". Maybe I'll go back and start writing right now...
Will someone please tell me why the heck boys are deciding now that I am worthy of a chase?? They prey on my loneliness. You fight dirty, you crazies.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Okay. I need a new job. I just went to pick up my measly paycheck and even the ATM didn't like the numbers on the check. Honestly, I love the family and kids I work for, but I need to take care of myself. I need to have a stable schedule with stable hours. They promised me full time work, and for the past month I have had like a 1/4 of that amount of work. I have an interview scheduled for Monday, but I am scared to tell the family. I told them that I have a mandatory class meeting on Monday morning, but I feel terrible. Then the mom went on to say how much she loves having me with her kids and how she wants to keep me even past when I get married... wth am I supposed to do with that info?? Let it fester and boil until I cry from guilt? Thing is, I have tried telling them that I need more hours and they said they would get me more. So I wonder if I am jumping the gun. But do I really want to chance my pay to an occasional wind? Lets list the pros and cons....
I can do school-work at work
5 second commute
The kids are adorable
I create the rules and schedule for the kids
I love the kids
I love working with children
Its good practice of running my own home with a family
Not a stable schedule
Not a stable check
The house is disgusting
I can't get the oldest to do anything other than video games
I am working in a bad-ish area
I have to work in a gross kitchen
When the kids are sick, I get sick
The kids have no discipline in their life with parents, so I start new each day
When I attempt to scrub the house, I come back the next day to the same state it was in when I started to clean it.
Another thing I feel I have to decide, is wth I want to do with my life. I have so many interests, and I feel like that is more of a hindrance than a good thing. Do I want to open a baking business? Do I want to teach elementary education? Do I want to teach vocal performance? What will fit best with my goals of marriage and family? Easily, all of them could fit. But its a matter of wanting to find a career before I have children, rather than trying to still figure it out when my child is 3 years old. That's how I am. I am constantly looking for something stable and sure... Oh shoot just got inspired...
All in all, this past blog break has proven to be fruitless and stressful. I feel better now having had written this all down somewhere and gotten it out of my head. Oh Blogger, your therapy is amazing.
495 days til my sanity returns, and 105 days until Christmas phone calls.....
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Saturday, July 17, 2010
I always told myself I’d be the cool mom. The one that sneaks you a cookie when Dad isn’t looking. The kind of mom that would let you drive up the state just because “all your friends were doing it”. And while I have yet to become a mother, I am responsible for the care of three young boys. Wanna know what I caught myself saying to one boy today? You guessed it. “Because I said so.” Yikes. Dreams of being The Cool Mom? Dashed.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Wednesday, June 30, 2010
Saturday, June 12, 2010
With starting my new job of babysitting for three rambunctious boys, I've had more time to evaluate my life than I thought I would have. I find myself thinking about what I have done so far these past 22 years, what I had hoped I would have done by now, and what my new goals are. And amazingly, I find that my answer to each of those questions are completely different from the other. Not a good sign. Sure, goals change. Life happens. But somewhere in the hub-bub of me getting to this place in life, I haven't accomplished much. The only things I have done that I am actually proud of are graduate high school, graduate Cosmetology, get my Cosmetology License, annnd.... Fall in love? Get hurt? Have a "stupendous" relationship with my family? Yea, I think not.
My life has been a big blob of Blah thusfar, and I can't change that. But suddenly, every ounce of me burns for something more. Call me crazy, but I know I'm meant to do something more with my life. I'm meant to be great. At what, I'm not sure. But there is some part of me that knows I'm meant for more, and it won't let the other parts rest until that is a realized fact. Call it my inner-self screaming of my divine nature. Call it the human will to accomplish. But I'm not normal. I'm above that. I should be doing something great and beautiful and pleasing and fulfilling all at the same time! But what?!?
There is a scene in the movie The Holiday that I love (actually, the whole movie is made of scenes I love). There is this "has-been" screenwriter who the Guild wants to honor, but for months he has been ignoring their attempts to contact him. Finally, Iris (a WONDERFUL woman on holiday from a manipulative ex) convinces him he should allow himself to be honored. A crazy series of events happens between the convincing and the attending of this Night with Abott, but my favorite scene is when he actually arrives.
In the lobby there is no one but the ushers and a few movie posters. And the ushers let him know that everyone is waiting for him, and they open the door to the auditorium. And here comes this feeble man, with the biggest heart and smallest ego, walking into a crowd of cheers and smiles. The place is FILLED with people who love him and his work; with people he has touched in one way or another. And on his face you see the amazement of a man who didn't know his worth.
As I watch that scene, I know that I am meant to have that. Someday, I will touch the lives of others with my work, whatever that ends up being. I am meant for something greater than I am allowing myself to have at this moment. And my heart breaks knowing that I don't have enough faith in myself to let me have it. I have this urge to touch someones life in a way that will leave ME speechless and leave my face full of amazement.
But I promise you this: I will have that. I will be a success. And I will be somebody to be proud of.
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
A lot has happened. I got a surprise phone call from the most amazing missionary ever (I LOVE YOU, JOHN!!), I got a job, I lost a job, I lost weight, I gained weight, then lost it again, had tons of fun with friends, Disneyland, ect ect. I'm doing a good job of accepting things and moving on though! So lesson learned! LOL.
I caught myself reading the "Missing You" greeting cards at the grocery store today. They were cute and I thought multiple times about purchasing a few of them to send of sporadically. But I refrained. And I bought teeth whitening gear instead. LOL.
Well, I have an interview tomorrow, and maybe it will pull through. But I've learned that once I am meant to have a job, I'll find one that will stick and I will enjoy. Well, enjoy enough to care to keep it.
At the end of this transfer, John will be a quarter done with his mission. Only 3 more times, only 3 more times....... He's worth it. :)
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
In talking with a few friends in the past few days I realized that while I consider myself a very self motivated person (I usually don't need an outside force to push me to do something), in actuality I do need positive reinforcement. My goal of losing 60 pounds has been a long standing one, that changes as my weight fluctuates. I've dieted most of my teens and into my twenties with no lasting results. I want THIS time to be the LAST time.
So here is my list of things that get me moving and feeling good about my goal. I encourage everyone to have a list like this, as it seriously brings so much strength to your plans. After making this list, you can't just wish your goal away. You now have set it in motion.
I'm a confidant person. I know what I want and how I'm going to get it. But sometimes, I let my weight push me around. I don't participate in activities that I feel like a fat-chick doing. I enjoy most sports, but I don't play with people who are skinnier than me. That's my deal, I know. But I always worry what others will think or see if I play with people who actually look like they know what they're doing. I want to play volleyball. I have so much fun playing, but can never work up the strength to actually get out and play, because who wants the fat-chick on their team? While I realize that wanting to be thinner should NOT limit what I participate in, it does.
I want to look good on my wedding day. The End. Everyone wants this. I just know that white isn't a great color on me as it is, and I want to look stunning in my pictures. I want to look back and be totally happy with my image. I don't want to be ashamed of showing my daughter my wedding pictures. I want to take the cute picture of John carrying me across a lawn. I want him to have his arms around me from behind and not push everything UP and OUT. I want to feel beautiful, and feel like I have earned the privilege to FEEL beautiful on my wedding day.
I want my kids to be proud of their mom. I want them to be able to say to their friends, "Yes, my mom is pretty, isn't she?" I know how kids are. I know how they think. I know how they talk. I used to talk crap on friends mom's who were larger. I know how much it hurt my friends when they found out what I had said. I don't want my kids to have that happen to them. I don't want to have them come home from kindergarten and have them cry "Sally said my mom was fat." It would hurt them, and it would hurt me. I want to be able to run with them, play with them, and shop with them. I want to be a grandmother to my grandchildren. I want to be an active person in their life, and show them how important it is to take care of yourself. I want to be old and feel young enough to be with my grandkids. I don't want to be like my own grandmother, sentenced to a chair for the rest of her life. I don't want to be addicted to food and be depressed because of it. I want to live a long and healthy life.
Now, I don't want you thinking that I am a horribly depressed girl who hates herself. I love myself. At the risk of sounding arrogant, I know I am attractive. I just want to better myself as a person and as a Daughter of God. I know its cliche, but it's true. My body is a temple, given to me on the condition that I take care of it. What better motivation than that? I NEED to take care of this beautiful creation that God intended for me and me alone. If God knows I can take care of my body, than I know I can.
All in all, this goal of mine can be reached. I know it, you know it, and God knows it. Why not make it a reality this time around?
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Does that make me a horrible person for loving another's demise? Probably. But for now, it makes my life seem a little better. :)
Friday, April 23, 2010
So today I just haven't felt much like doing anything. Today was one of those no-makeup-loose-jeans-huge-sweater days. Ever had those? I'm sure everyone has. I don't even feel like writing in here. I just did it because I realized I needed to. And it was day 100.
Remember in elementary school on the 100th day of school? Everyone would make posters with 100 something on it. Pennies, macaroni noodles, rice, pop corn kernels... All in the shape of the number 100. I feel like doing that today, but what should I use? I could use paperclips. Or I could use clippings from all the envelopes I've gotten. But seriously? I probably won't do that. LOL.
I've come to the realization that nothing is going to change about my family. They are going to stay the same annoying bunch that they always are. I can try to fit my way into their annoying ways and try to tolerate it, or I can just be totally and completely unhappy. I'm leaning more towards the latter option, but I know that would make me a masochist and a glutten for punishment. Eh.
THE ONLY THING that seems to bring me any kind of pleasure or relief from life right now is reading. My favorite book of all time, The Time Traveler's Wife. SOOO GOOD. I love the triumph of love over time, and the amazing relationship that builds so unconventionally. I find myself relating to Clare Abshire more than I can relate to another acutal person. LOL. But isn't that what novels were written for? For you to relate to characters in ways you can't relate to real life? I love the dynamics of their relationship (Henry and Clare), and I love that their love survives MORE than just years, weeks, days, hours and minutes apart. THAT is true love. True love waits, and not only in the cliche'd way everyone thinks. True love WAITS. Amen, Audrey Niffenegger. Amen.
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
As much as I love writing in here, sometimes my words aren't enough to calm my own mind. Here are a few quotes that have changed my life, and will likely change yours. :)
You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.--Sam Keen
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.--Helen Keller
Keep away from small people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.--Mark Twain
Don't be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.--Kenny Rogers
Life is change. Growth is optional. Choose wisely.--Karen Kaiser Clark
We are not born all at once, but by bits. The body first, and the spirit later; and the birth and growth of the spirit, in those who are attentive to their own inner life, are slow and exceedingly painful. Our mothers are racked with the pains of our physical birth; we ourselves suffer the longer pains of our spiritual growth.--Mary Antin
Sometimes I wish that I was the weather, you'd bring me up in conversation forever. And when it rained, I'd be the talk of the day.--John Mayer
Of course we're Christian. The very name of the church declares that. The more people see us and come to know us, the more I believe they will come to realize that we are trying to exemplify in our lives and in our living the great ideals which (Jesus Christ) taught.--Gordon B. Hinckley
Life is 10% of what happens to me and 90% of how I react to it.--John Maxwell
A woman can't be alone. She needs a man. A man and a woman support and strengthen each other. She just can't do it by herself.--Marilyn Monroe
And my personal favorite from a man who is simultaneously a genius and an Arrogant Albert,
Life is like a box of crayons. Most people are the 8-color boxes, but what you're really looking for are the 64-color boxes with the sharpeners on the back. I fancy myself to be a 64-color box, though I've got a few missing. It's OK though, because I've got some more vibrant colors like periwinkle at my disposal. I have a bit of a problem though in that I can only meet the 8-color boxes. Does anyone else have that problem? I mean there are so many different colors of life, of feeling, of articulation.. so when I meet someone who's an 8-color type.. I'm like, hey girl, magenta! and she's like, oh, you mean purple! and she goes off on her purple thing, and I'm like, no - I want magenta!--John Mayer
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
My parents seem to lack the ability to let their children grow up. Hiding the remote from the family was fine when the oldest was 10. Locking cabinets was okay when you had toddler's in the house. Placing a password on EVERYTHING in the house that could possibly use one, is terrific when you are worried about porn addictions and the like. Putting a curfew on each of your children, telling them that you never change things on them, then texting them an hour before their "new and improved" curfew goes in effect, is NOT okay.
My parents keep talking about how they want me to feel closer to the family; how I should feel that my "house is a haven from the outside world". Little do they know that in fact, the outside world is a haven from my house. I can't stand being with people who don't want me there anyway. And no matter how many times I talk to them about how I feel, it never changes. They still make snide remarks about "well why don't you just move out?" and "if you were more RESPONSIBLE..." blah blah blah. OKAY. Last I checked, I take care of a lot of things so they don't have to. I pay my bills, though it takes quite a bit of scrounging. I clean my messes, though usually someone just makes the same mess after me. I do what they ask me to, though that usually results in them telling me I don't do enough around the house. I focus my time and energy on finding a job, but when I am in the lingo period of waiting to hear back, they complain that I should get out of the house. THEN when I do, they change curfew on me, tell me I should do more around the house, and that I need a job... EFF. THIS. Just ONCE I would love for them to SAY what they mean and MEAN what they say.
Another example of how much my family REALLY wants me to feel a part of this "family", I scheduled a sit in with the City of Brea today, and was told that my family is going to the beach today. BUT that they would wait until 12 so that I could go. I wake up this morning, to find everyone in their suits, packing lunches and swapping towels. So you can understand, how confused I was when it was 9:00 and they were supossed to leave at 12:00. When I asked my mom about this, she said they had changed their mind and were leaving at 10:30---the time I was scheduled for my sit in. WOW. GREAT way to make me feel a part of this family, go to the beach for family day and NOT invite me.
And they wonder why I want to leave so much... oh I pity the fool.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Thats actually kinda difficult for me to answer, seeing as I don't really watch TV on a regular enough basis to identify with anyone. LOL. But off the top of my head, I would have to say Rachel Berry from Glee. She's a religious-quirky-controlling-demanding-"persuasive"-motivated performer with high standards for herself and those around her. She rubs people the wrong way, but generally is just looking out for them. Half the "crazy" things she does, I empathize with. LOL. Sure, she has high aspirations. But in the end, she just wants to be loved. :)
2. Describe your morning routine
Wake up, scripture study, sleep again :), breakfast (only sometimes... THAT needs to change, I know), chores, write a letter..... wait for a job to call me. LOL. BORING life, I'm trying to change that.
3. How do you do lunch? Bring from home or dine out? Same thing every day or mix it up?
Seeing as I'm at home every day for lunch... LOL. But when I was at school, I would bring my lunch. And if you brought a pb&j sandwhich, you were boring. Really though, the cooler the lunch item, the more interesting you were. We all brought leftover meals from home. Or Lean Cuisine. MMM... My favorite to bring was the Seasame Chicken. DE-LISH.
4. What is one moment that, although seemingly trivial at the time, changed your life?
The moment I decided to share my music with the ward in our Talent Show. It was really last minute for me, and I wasn't even sure I wanted to do it, because it was the first time I was going to play my music for anyone who wasn't outside my closed bedroom door. Who knew, that playing that night, would cause the love of my life to actually work up the courage to talk to me, because now we had something in common. LOL. He approached me two days later and we started our friendship based soley on music. :) What a way to start a relationship, eh?
5. Name your top three beauty products.
1)Leave in conditioner. 2) Concealor. 3) Black mascara.
6. What do you do when you’re alone in the car?
Sing as loud as I can to whatever is on the radio, try to find different harmonies than the ones they're already singing. Oh, and I'll critique others driving habits... loudly. LOL.
7. What is the ideal city for you to live in?
That is a tough question that I really don't think I have enough experience to answer. But, I think I'd like to live in a safe city in SoCal. Does such a place exist? LOL. And yes, I know I didn't really answer the question.
8. Are you waiting for something?
It seems I am always waiting for something. Waiting for Glee to start back up, waiting for the mail, waiting for the weekend, waiting for a missionary... Waiting is a continual game that everyone plays.
9. What was the last shocking news you heard?
That my plans to move out may actually work. And sooner than November, no less!
10. What are three things you wouldn’t do for a million dollars?
1) Cut off any part of my body. 2) ANY immoral act (including things that go against my standards) 3) Drink anyones bodily fluid. Blood, urine, sweat, ect? NO WAY.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Did I expect that I wouldn't ever be thinking about how attractive other guys are? HEAVEN'S no. I'm not so naive to think that somehow I, a 21 year old girl on the verge of many-a-mental-breakdown, would be exempt to natural laws of human nature. I DID however, expect to not have such an issue with stupid "dream cheating".
LAME. What I dream about can NOT be helped, and does NOT reflect my waking desires. So why am I freaking out, wanting to avoid all men? Maybe because being a dream-cheater is... enjoyable? Loathsome? Fun? Horrible? You decide. As for me, I'm going to live on No-Doze and caffeinated cola for this up-and-coming new fad my brain has decided to partake in. Thanks, brain. You always know just what to do to make me crazy.
Monday, March 15, 2010
I then chat with a fellow dieter/jogger and feel once again motivated to really go out and give the track a good pounding from my feet. LOL. IT. FELT. SO. GOOD. I know I already blogged about how much I am really enjoying being outside and exercising, but every time I get back out there every morning, I feel so much better. After my weekly weigh-in, I have discovered that I have lost 3 pounds!!! BEST FEELING EVER. Not only knowing that it is actually physically possible for me to lose weight, but also knowing that I WANT to do it some MORE! Lol. It seems like lately, I've been having all these motivating things happen to me. What makes this time so different? Why is it I actually feel like going out jogging everyday, no fail? Is it because I have put everything I have in the Lord? Which leads me to today's lesson. I had the "opportunity" to be in Brother Rosell's institute class today ALL BY MYSELF. Just me and the teacher. Some people may ask... "Why is that such an opportunity??" Well, because it gave me a greater feeling that I was literally hearing what I, ME, MYSELF, needed to hear. I trusted that he was allowing the Spirit to work through him, and indeed it was. He said he wasn't going to go through his prepared lesson, but was going to meander through a few chapters and verses here and there. We went through Luke 5, with Simon Peter being put as the main focus. I can't recall everything that was said or taught, but the one I do remember the most, was the end of the chapter, where Jesus is discussing a parable for the newly called disciples. He refers to a piece of new cloth not being able to patch old cloth, because it would ruin both pieces. And also new wine not being poured into an old bottle, because the bottle would burst and spill the new wine, therefore destroying both. Now normally, I read little parables like that and take them at face value, not really knowing what they mean. But after dissecting it with Brother Rosell, I was able to understand that he was actually talking about how the new Law of Christ can not patch the old Law of Moses. Because the two laws are very contradicting to each other. And he asked me, "How can we relate this to OUR lives? Not just the New Testament?" After some thought, I was reminded of how we, as humans, tend to cling to the old, and are not willing to commit to a change. And how Christ NEEDS us to change sometimes, so we can be presented with greater callings, bringing greater blessings. We, as the natural man, can not coexist with the person God wants us to be. We have to be willing to accept this new cloth or new wine. And in order to do so, we can not be "old" in our understanding of His gospel. This brought me to think about times in my life that I chose to either accept or turn down the new cloth/wine. I started thinking about my current situation of pride and being unforgiving. I've been trying harder to realize when I am actually guilty of this, and stopping dead in my tracks to change it. I have felt a greater purpose since attacking this fault head on, and I feel the Lord slowly pouring new wine into the new bottle I am creating. Coming to realize the change I am making and the change God wants for me coincides with the other is the greatest feeling. I just got my weekly email from John. I am soooo proud of that man. I love him soooo much. :) He is definitely one of those things that keeps me going, and helps me realize that there is a greater purpose for my life. All in all, this should be a great week. :) Let's see if it plays out that way. ♥
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Short entries.... All I have time for! LOL. I'm off to the temple for the first time in a long time (NEVER let your limited use reccoment expire, Jessica. Because then you take FOREVER to remember to get it renewed. BAD Jessica!!). I can not WAIT!!
Peace and Happiness... my best friends for the day. :)