In talking with a few friends in the past few days I realized that while I consider myself a very self motivated person (I usually don't need an outside force to push me to do something), in actuality I do need positive reinforcement. My goal of losing 60 pounds has been a long standing one, that changes as my weight fluctuates. I've dieted most of my teens and into my twenties with no lasting results. I want THIS time to be the LAST time.
So here is my list of things that get me moving and feeling good about my goal. I encourage everyone to have a list like this, as it seriously brings so much strength to your plans. After making this list, you can't just wish your goal away. You now have set it in motion.
I'm a confidant person. I know what I want and how I'm going to get it. But sometimes, I let my weight push me around. I don't participate in activities that I feel like a fat-chick doing. I enjoy most sports, but I don't play with people who are skinnier than me. That's my deal, I know. But I always worry what others will think or see if I play with people who actually look like they know what they're doing. I want to play volleyball. I have so much fun playing, but can never work up the strength to actually get out and play, because who wants the fat-chick on their team? While I realize that wanting to be thinner should NOT limit what I participate in, it does.
I want to look good on my wedding day. The End. Everyone wants this. I just know that white isn't a great color on me as it is, and I want to look stunning in my pictures. I want to look back and be totally happy with my image. I don't want to be ashamed of showing my daughter my wedding pictures. I want to take the cute picture of John carrying me across a lawn. I want him to have his arms around me from behind and not push everything UP and OUT. I want to feel beautiful, and feel like I have earned the privilege to FEEL beautiful on my wedding day.
I want my kids to be proud of their mom. I want them to be able to say to their friends, "Yes, my mom is pretty, isn't she?" I know how kids are. I know how they think. I know how they talk. I used to talk crap on friends mom's who were larger. I know how much it hurt my friends when they found out what I had said. I don't want my kids to have that happen to them. I don't want to have them come home from kindergarten and have them cry "Sally said my mom was fat." It would hurt them, and it would hurt me. I want to be able to run with them, play with them, and shop with them. I want to be a grandmother to my grandchildren. I want to be an active person in their life, and show them how important it is to take care of yourself. I want to be old and feel young enough to be with my grandkids. I don't want to be like my own grandmother, sentenced to a chair for the rest of her life. I don't want to be addicted to food and be depressed because of it. I want to live a long and healthy life.
Now, I don't want you thinking that I am a horribly depressed girl who hates herself. I love myself. At the risk of sounding arrogant, I know I am attractive. I just want to better myself as a person and as a Daughter of God. I know its cliche, but it's true. My body is a temple, given to me on the condition that I take care of it. What better motivation than that? I NEED to take care of this beautiful creation that God intended for me and me alone. If God knows I can take care of my body, than I know I can.
All in all, this goal of mine can be reached. I know it, you know it, and God knows it. Why not make it a reality this time around?